neorants

Check out this upcoming scary flick. OK, maybe it’s not supposed to be scary, but I’m sure you can see where I’m coming from. As for those who can’t see where I’m coming from because they didn’t click the link, let me sum it up for you…

Apparently, someone has decided that making a movie about the life of Martha Stewart (a.k.a. Lucifer) would be “a good thing.” Cybill Shepherd “won” the role of Martha but, according to the article, Robin Williams was on the short-list to play her as well. Now that would have been interesting, if they could have convinced a big name like Williams to play a she-devil on a made-for-TV movie — not likely.

As for those of you saying “But Neo, Martha is great! Her line of products is top-notch and her recipes are downright yummy!” Snap out of it! You’ve clearly been ensnared by her evil mind control rays and are well on your way to becoming one of her hellish minions. Just look at what it’s done to the staff working on this movie: “It was green-lit and rushed into production,” said director Jason Ensler. “We work on the script as we’re shooting.” How to you explain a movie concept as twisted as this being rushed through without even being given proper thought? Mind control, baby! That’s how!

Still not convinced of her ties to the occult? Check out this quotation from Cybill Shepherd in the article:

“I need to channel Martha though me, as if I were Martha.”

If that statement doesn’t send shivers down your spine, I don’t know what will. First, because Martha must be a demonic force to be reckoned with, indeed, for channeling is a practice usually reserved for the spirits of the dead. And second — well, does the world really need two Marthas?

Brace yourself — this abomination is coming to a TV near you courtesy of NBC this May.